It used to be what we all needed, reassurance that we are doing a good job. I'm older now and I don't need a pat on the back to know that the job I'm doing is a good one. I know I do good work, it's not egotistical, it's pride, and whenever I do anything I want to look back and be proud of my accomplishment.
A lot of people out there do not have that sense that what they are doing is good work, and they second guess themselves constantly. These people need to have someone else tell them they have done a good job to give them confidence to carry on.
When we get taken for granted, and the work we do becomes just a task that needs to be carried out and our peers look down on us with scorn when it isn't done in an acceptable manner, is when we start doing that same task with less effort.
Everybody needs a pat on the back so that they don't just do the task, they exceed at doing it. The feeling of gratitude from others when you have worked really hard at something will make you want to do it again and again, and each time maybe you will do it a little better than you did before.
I do find that too much praise will go to some peoples head, so there has to be an equal balance of negativity and positivity. Maybe not negativity but instead constructive criticism.
Our children need this type of experience when they are learning chores and life skills. As parents we sometimes get into a routine of always complaining when something isn't up to our standards. When children or anyone always hears the negative side of things, why would they want to improve upon them? We have to acknowledge the good things they do and not just the bad.
Scott Goerz
