I read this story and I'll rewrite it for you here:
Woman's perspective:
Tonight, I thought my husband was acting weird. We had made plans at our favorite restaurant for dinner. I was out shopping with my friends all day, so I thought he was a little upset when I showed up a bit late, but he made no comment on it. After dinner the conversation wasn't flowing, so I suggested we go for a nice walk which he agreed to, but he barely said a word the whole time. I asked him what was wrong, and he simply replied "It's nothing." Then I asked him if he was upset because I was a bit late for dinner. He said he wasn't upset and nothing was wrong, it has nothing to do with me and not to worry. On the way home I told him I loved him, he smiled, patted my hand and kept driving. I can't explain his behavior and I don't know why he didn't say I love you too.
When we got home, I felt as if I had lost him completely, as if he wanted nothing to with me, he just sat there watching TV, he continued to seem absent and distant. With silence all around us I decided to go to bed. 15 minutes later he came to bed but I felt he was still distracted and his thoughts were somewhere else. He finally fell asleep without saying a word. I cried, I don't know what to do and I'm sure his thoughts are about someone else, my life is a disaster.
Man's Thoughts for the entire evening:
Why won't my motorcycle start? (continually thinking about all the possibilities and solutions)
Jumping to conclusions:
The woman in this story is clearly insecure, this couple is supposed to be married and you would think she would know her husband by now. Maybe they got married quick after dating, so she doesn't know how men's minds work. In any case coming up with your own conclusions without actually knowing any of the facts first is completely unhealthy and could ruin the relationship over time. This woman knows her husband is off and deep in thought she could have told her husband exactly how it was effecting her he might have told her what was going on.
The man in this story knows his wife knows nothing about fixing a broken motorcycle, so he doesn't want to bother her with the details because he knows she can't help him. I think he should have told her what was on his mind because as her husband he should know that she unnecessarily worries when she isn't being paid attention to. Even if she can't help him, letting her know what is on his mind alleviates any worries she might have.
Talking about our problems and issues with our spouses is healthy, and even if the other person doesn't understand the complexities of your situation they might say something that might give you an idea on a possible solution.
Neither sex can read minds, I know a lot of couples think that the other person should just know how they are feeling and how to act, but most of the time both sides are oblivious. Get talking, start communicating, and life will be better for both of you.
Scott Goerz
